Cut to the heart

At a Valentine's party the other day, we all received party gifts, in which was found a fruit-of-the-spirit bracelet. The one I got was "kindness." At first I thought, oh that's a good reminder. Easy to say, but upon further observance on my life the last few days, I've been saddened to realize how unkind my ways can be. And I pinpoint this all down to something so rotten and disgusting, yet comfortable and attractive: my flesh. In guarding and seeking my own way, I do things that do not have the other person's best interests in mind. God, how I wish this terrible annoyance and great challenger was rid of, at this very moment! But, oh, how it reminds me that I NEED Him. I thank Him that He has never given me anything but utter lovingkindness. When He could have demanded that I do this and that, and show Him how much I love Him in order to earn His love in return, instead He said this: "when we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." Also, the Bible says, "we love Him because He first loved us." I didn't have to clean up all my ways first. Never in my most hoped for dreams could I ever be good enough to earn His love. He gave it freely and willingly. But, not only do I have His unwavering love and gift of salvation, but He also gives us the victory in this life over our sin. It wouldn't make sense for Him to go through all the agony and sufferings of death and paying for our sins and then rising again to just leave us in the same state we were before our salvation. No, He has given us "newness of life." This newness of life offers us hope of walking without the power of sin in our life. The next time temptation stares you in the face and calls your name, realize right then and there that it has no power, no right to demand you to do what it desires. Christ has freed you from that way of life, from the former slave master of sin and death. You are free, you are victorious! This passage from Romans 12 was refreshing to me today:
I beseech you therefore brethren by the mercies of God that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God for this is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good, acceptable, and perfect will of God.

Communicate

Any relationship needs communication. It provides the facts needed to be in agreement, to be intimate, to know what's inside each other's heads. Being it's the day of celebrating love and relationships, I'm prone to think of such things. But, honestly, unless you communicate, and do so well, your relationship could be on feeble ground. If you don't know what is going on or are confused because of communication problems, it's tough to walk alongside in such a relationship. And how often do we forget the most important relationship of all? The one between Creator and His creation, Father and child, but even more intimate He calls us friends. It seems like such a struggle, this relationship between us, because I'm constantly in the realm of the physical and yet He is spiritual. Oh God, focus my mind more on you... give me spiritual eyes and a heart that yearns for You.

Christianity doesn't work

Message caught your attention, didn't it? This was one of the key phrases in a message I heard tonite at youth group. I understood the gist of the speaker's message, but I'm not sure if I will be able to convey it accurately to you. Basically, it comes down to the fact that this life isn't about being the best Christian you can be, the best parent, the best spouse, the best whatever. Jesus didn't call us to be Christians, that's what the world called us. Jesus calls us to be disciples! Another important point was made that we need to give serious care to our soul. This is where our life stems from, so what condition is your soul in? Are you living in constant communion with the living God?? I ask myself this often... it is one of my desires to be living in God's will at every moment, to be sensitive to His direction in all things. Where is your focus? What are your attitudes? Are you addressing your fears, which may stem ultimately from a lack of belief in God's promises? Where is your faith? Are you pursuing Him with utter devotion? Take time to think about these questions, honestly evaluating yourself. I know I'm going to.

A proverb a day..

Back in proverbs again... I was gazing on chapter 4, I believe. At first, it was good reading... your typical "bless the righteous" / "don't follow the ways of the wicked." I started dwelling on it, and decided there's got to be more than just the surface. So, it talked about not following after the wicked because basically all they want to do is to destroy and murder. I thought about those who are not saved, which is classified as the "wicked" in God's sight. I know many people, unsaved, who are very good and such lovely people to be around. Could you possibly picture them as murders and lying in wait to shed blood? My little old neighbour next door, my friend in class, the friendly gas station attendant, etc. However, it struck me that although these would all be considered "good" in our eyes, they are "wicked" in God's eyes because they do not choose to follow Him but seek their own way in life. Even if they're devote, "religious" people, if they've decided their way is the right/only way to God, these are in the "wicked" category. These people may impose their way on others or discourage others from being a Christian. Or they may simply be satisfied in their own false sense of being religious. Either way, they're leading someone to their death, whether it's themselves (through self deception) or others. So this is what the proverbs led me to thinking today... it's not that every "wicked" person is wanting to physically kill others, but they most definitely are killing someone spiritually by their stubborn ways and refusal to submit to our loving, holy God. I'm not pointing a finger at who's good or who's bad, but God outlines it in His word so trust that.

that's me, left 

can spiritual gifts have a negative side?

in my tuesday night bible study, we've been studying the spiritual gifts. we had to complete an inventory test to see what gifts we might be endowed with. i think the test results are pretty accurate, and they confirmed things i already assumed in my life. others had already indicated certain areas that i had fit, which was another confirmation.

my question is this: can your spiritual gift- obviously with positive inclinations- have a negative side? i've had this thought before... particularly with my gift, i can start doing the opposite of what it's meant for and use my inclinations in a way they weren't meant for. i don't know how to explain it without out being blunt about what it is, sorry. but, with anything that's a blessing of God, we can get sidetracked from the gift that it is and twist it into something it wasn't meant for. this isn't hard to do, being sin-stricken creatures, prone to our fleshy whims and ways. oh God, save us from ourselves and help us be wholly yours.

pretending to be spiritual

so in my daily readings i've come to the proverbs. currently i'm in chapter 2. and consequently 2 things struck me this morning.... first, when you want wisdom, you need to cry out for it, call out for it. who doesn't want wisdom?? of course there's a desire there. but we need to realize the desire. the second part is harder because it requires effort... it says to look for it as silver, to search for it as hidden treasure. but the results are worth it all: then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. wow. that that's possible for us is simply amazing. how often do we take for granted ALL the RICHES that God's bestowed to us, that are waiting for us to take hold of. but yet we sit around only hoping that some day we can have a dip in the bucket of all God's goodness. we need to wake up people. this is not only a call to you, but a call to myself. it's easy to say that we have a desire. i can say till i'm blue in the face that i want to know Him, but what does it matter if i'm not acting on it? it means nothing. good intentions with nothing put forth are simply that, good intentions. what will good intentions get me in heaven? nothing but heartache and lamenting at the fact i could've done more. we need to stop deceiving ourselves and open up to the opportunity to TAKE HOLD of what God's given us. don't just want it or think you want it. ACT. may He grant you the grace to press on and appropriate all that He has for you...

...their devotion to the Lord was partial (Ananais and Sapphira) but they wanted it to seem complete. They wanted to be looked upon by others as those who loved him greatly. They were acting a part. Here is a real danger to God's children- to pretend to be spiritual. Whenever in spiritual matters we put on a garment which does not match our actual condition, we are not being true worshippers... the Father seeks those who, however simply, worship him in spirit and in reality.
-Watchman Nee, "The Joyful Heart: Daily Meditations," Feb. 3

my first blog posting ever...

nothing too magnanimous, just a little blog to tell about me so i can hear from you. what a grand concept... broader than email even. thanks to my good friend rachel, i came up with the idea to make my own blog. you can hear about me, i can hear about you, and everyone ends up happy. i'll make this brief, but before signing off, i just wanted to let you in on a bit of what i've been thinking on lately. one of my friends told me she has decided this year to start making a habit of praying on her walks between classes. so, i was just playing around in my head and came up with "walk & talk" and "pray on the way"... catchy little phrases to remind me to pray while i'm just walking around. we have so much time in the day but how much of it do we spend in prayer? at our last prayer meeting/bible study at church, the topic was prayer, quaintly enough. but the speaker said one thing that's stuck in my mind: "prayer is the weakest link in our christian experience." sadly enough, i think it's true. diligence and focus are things we lack, as well as a decent sense of the dependence on God that really exists in each of our lives. honestly when it comes down to it, i don't want to be a "15 min devotion in the morning is my time devoted to God" type girl. i want to be consumed with Him... i want every thought that i think, every decision i make, every place i go, every person i interact with, i just want everything i do to be influenced by Him and that everything i do would follow accordingly. i can float through this life on my own, living day in and day out as i want. but deep down.... that's not enough. there's got to be more, and He is ALL.

looks like this blog deal is going to be a little glimpse into my thoughts... you will get a chance to get into my head. scary but true. alright, take'r easy.
beth